You’re just trying to keep things simple in your life, and no one will blame you for that. Relationships can be complex and you just want to have fun by meeting a few people online. So you find this person you chat, you get on well so you hook up a few times and you both agree to keep it casual / no feelings involved. But as time goes on, you start feeling for them, you just can’t help it. Should you ask them out for serious, or is it completely the wrong move?
Can’t turn back
The thing about casual hook-ups is that most people do them because they don’t want anything more. The idea that you are feeling love for them is probably not what they are expecting, especially since you’ve both made a point of keeping things casual. Burt without a doubt, once you start feeling for someone, it is always best to tell them. If you don’t, you will kind of be lying to them every time you see them and you don’t tell them. And let’s be quite real: once you feel like that about someone, you can’t just force it out of your head. Even if you manage to trick your mind into it somehow, it will only result in you feeling sad. If you respect that person, then you will tell them you feelings and assume the consequences.
It could go well…
Okay so it all sounds a little harsh. Maybe you partner is also developing feelings for you but they’re just taking their time. Sure at first you just meet for sex, but the fact that you keep meeting again means that at the very least you are sexually compatible and also comfortable with each other.Maybe your casual partner will react well, at the very least they should appreciate your honesty. Expressing your feelings can be the hardest thing, and the very fact that you felt at ease telling them should show them how much you value them.
It could go wrong…
You were a good time but now you’ve stepped too far… but at least you’ve been honest. The arrangement can’t really go on when the two sides don’t share the same objectives anymore. But it’s still better like that than carrying on pretending things are casual. Eventually it will come out, and your partner will be shocked that you’ve felt for them all that time without having told them. Even if the relationship is casual, they will still think they could trust you to say what you think. But maybe you will find out later that it wasn’t quite love you were feeling. Rather you were just starting to be comfortable with someone. Don’t worry, there are plenty of other singles out there, you can find love again.
Things just happen
That’s the moral to this article… things just happen. You can’t always control certain feelings any more than a dog can stop starring at your food. Sure you planned for casual and you end up with love in your head, but that happens to the best of us. You can’t plan for all your feelings, instead just try to live through them in the hope that it will make you take the right decision.